Hope this video doesn't depress anyone, because as we all know Kermit and Miss Piggy split up (for good?!) this year. Which...I don't know, feels a bit Kardashian/gossip news courting for my liking. I don't know if Jim Henson would have approved. Plus we all know Kermit and Miss Piggy are (dysfunctional, in need of therapy) soul mates! How is the new show, has anyone seen it? From what I've read it's gone down a bit like a lead balloon, so maybe let's us 80's children remember the good times.
So I don't know, I always feel uncomfortable talking about/giving any kind of marriage advice because I know most of the things I read come off as cliched. But well, it's weird. When we started out we were one of many couples in our group, most of which have now split. 14 years is a looooong time these days. Plus it's weird when celebrities who got married around the same time as us split, as most of them have, is it just me who notices stuff like that? So is it just dumb luck or are we doing something right?
We're certainly not perfect, it makes me superstitious to even talk about what works for us. Weirdly enough I watched that Meryl Streep/Tommy Lee Jones film Hope Springs this weekend about a long term married couple who are on their last legs and go to a counselor played by Steve Carrell for drastic marriage therapy. It's a bit cringe inducing/painful at times but I imagine that's what marriage therapy is like! I would like to think that if we ever reached that stage we would want to at least try to see if we could work it out. A lot of the death of relationships seems to revolve around couples simply drifting apart and not communicating, which is what happens sometimes I guess but it does make me sad to see.
There was a line at the end of the film about how most marriages have rough patches that can last a year (or more!), about just how much work and temerity they take to last any length of time (or something to that effect). Which isn't very fun to think about but is probably closer to the truth than a lot of advice I've heard. And the truth is sometimes people get tired of the fight, I get that. There's a line in a Ryan Adams song off of his last album (not the Taylor Swift one!) which really struck me: "I'm tired of giving up so easy, I'm tired of giving up at all."
I mean this is just a very sad song about the end of a relationship. "You keep running away".
So yeah. What I will say is that I'm lucky to be married to someone who doesn't give up, who doesn't run away. Of course we fight sometimes but we rarely fight for long. He goes out of his way to make me laugh in good times and in bad. To just be there, in the room, and not rest until something is fixed the best we can fix it that day. And if I'm honest he is much better at it than me. I am the one who tries to swallow my feelings sometimes, but luckily I married a nosy parker who badgers me like a puppy when he can tell I'm upset! And it doesn't sound super sage or anything but I think it's part of what keeps us glued together.
We're a team, we don't spend huge amounts of time apart really, and I know that is much easier without kids. But I'd like to think it will continue, because no matter how much time passes I still feel grateful and lucky to have found someone who makes me feel so safe and at home in the world, even if that means living in a different country to the one I was born in!
|Getting my husband to pose for goofy pictures in Florida to prove his love once more!|