Sunday Confessions (a day late... ;-)



I confess: I wasn't going to do Sunday Confessions, but I have lost most of my blogging mojo lately and feel I should force myself to write something, anything. A lot to do with world events I guess? Or is that just an easy cop out? I do feel like if you are constantly upset and depressed by the news it can be hard to switch into blogger mode sometimes. I feel like I should say something, but I am just me, I do not have anything meaningful or helpful to say.

I grew up in Virginia and was very saddened by what happened in Charlottesville. I never met a racist or white supremacist in my life in Virginia, it never felt like the "deep south" to me growing up, but I was a kid, obviously I only saw what kids see. I was actually bused across town for racial integration in schools in the 80's, a controversial program that eventually ended, that I think was actually probably a mistake to end. I think even that small thing did make a difference in how I grew up, especially after I moved to mostly white schools in Massachusetts.

There is also the added pressure of being an American abroad and having that paranoia that everyone thinks I'm an asshole now because of my stupid President. I know it's mostly not the case, but I did have more people being rude to me/confrontational (ironic eh, and I'm supposedly the rude one), back when George W. was president, and I do feel some of that seeping back in. Countries love to feel smug and superior to other countries, even when their own dumb asses voted for Brexit (because RACISM). Grr I will stop now.

I confess: It's probably partly pms, but I have legitimately wanted to murder lots of people this week. Ok murder is a strong word. Punch in the face? Yesterday I was at the self checkout till in Tesco with my husband. Some guy was beside/at the till in front of us and he forgot to get something so he went to get it. As he came back, he brushed past me and brushed my ass with his hand. The kind of thing that can accidentally happen. Only there was PLENTY OF F*CKING SPACE and it wasn't necessary at all. My ass is not that huge! And it was just...I knew it was on purpose. You KNOW. But what can you do? It happens every day to women, it's tiny, it's not a "grope", it's the bullshit cowardly way of being a pig. And it didn't even occur to me to say anything. But it enraged me aftewards. This is life as a woman, every day. Accidents happen. But we know when it's on purpose, douche wads.

I confess: Sorry, not sorry for being ragey.

I confess: I have discovered one thing that genuinely tunes out all of the noise of the messed up world, if only for 40 minutes. Project Runway, on Netflix. I have never watched this show other than a few episodes when I'm in the States when my Mom watches it. So I don't even know, I just randomly started watching season 7. It's magical. I might go back to the start and watch them all. Without adverts, it is especially soothing and fun to watch. The format of it is comforting - get the task, freak out, go to Mood, make a dress/outfit that seems on the verge of falling apart/not coming together, then magically there is a runway show with all of the creations whipped up in just over 24 hours! Tim Gunn makes everything better, Heidi Klum's sweet yet stern composure gives it just enough edge. Michael Kors is a bit over the top hamming it up but I can deal. Please god don't let snooty bowl cut woman win - Team Anthony! (I know this is so out of date, I legit have no idea when this even aired!).



Linking up with The United States of Becky :-)

6 comments

  1. aw man, what a week eh? For the record I know you're a good person and not a dumb ass Trump voter! Just as I'm not a Brexiteer ;)

    Christy xx
    Dinner Stories

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    1. Aw thanks! I don't know any Brexiteers...well one, but I won't go into that! I just have my hackles up, hopefully (surely?) things will settle down soon...this insanity can only go on for so long? :-0)

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  2. Oh god it sucks that happened to you, I'd be ragey too.

    I think with the Bush/Trump thing, I get the sense that most people - even those who would usually tar a whole nation with the same brush - recognise that Trump is SO out of the ordinary that there's not that sense of blame like there was with Bush, if you know what I mean? Blame is not quite the right word, but my American cousins definitely talk about being treated differently abroad during his era but that not happening yet with 45. Joanna was telling me at my wedding that she's mostly getting commiserations this time around.

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    1. I think what bugged my most was my own response was not immediate...like it's happened so many times, in worse ways, I just shut down. If anything I'm most mad at myself, which I know is b.s. Down with the patriarchy!!

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  3. Ew at the butt touching guy :( That really sucks.

    I've never been out of the country so I have no frame of reference for how Americans get treated based on who our president is, but I could see how that could happen.

    I have encountered racists lots of places, California is not as progressive/liberal as people think it is. It's such a bummer that our president has emboldened these ideals.

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    1. Yep racism is just like a nasty little cockroach waiting for permission to crawl out of its hole. You are so right that Trump has emboldened (and encouraged it).

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